A Perfect 10

Finished the season on the sideline.

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  It's not shocking news, really. I've been hinting at it, and toying with it for months. Some might say for years.

  But I'm making it official. My basketball sneakers have been hung up. For good.

  It's not as difficult to say those words, or type those words, as I thought it would be. Maybe because the signs have been pointing to 'retirement' for quite some time.

  The injuries were one thing. But the mental outlook was quite another.

  Most of you know, I was on the sideline a great deal this past season. Your body not holding up, not allowing you to do your job, spoke volumes. There was nothing more frustrating than not being able to do what you wanted to physically.

Fan art from my second year in Italy.

  But still, some might not want to end their career on the sideline. And I just could be stubborn enough to try something like that. There had to be more than a faulty back to push me into the real world.

  Mentally and emotionally, I was ready. My mind and my heart were screaming to me that my basketball career had run its course. The lifestyle, the constant moving, the uncertainty, has worn me down. I guess I've had enough.

  Ten seasons overseas is perfect anyway, don't you think? I've always been a stickler for balance and a little square that way (my nice-and-square SAT scores, for example -- exactly the same in both the math and the verbal).

A fun moment -- All Star game warm up -- Poland.

  Ten is a nice round number. Ten seasons gave me plenty of time to play basketball, the game I fell in love with as a little girl, the game that helped give me confidence and an identity, the game that has provided me with so many opportunities -- to see the world and meet incredible people, for a living!

  But now it's time for the next chapter.

  And before you ask, 'well, now what are you going to do?' Let me just say that I'm working on it!

  There are a lot of different directions I can go. So I am hoping to take some time this summer, weigh my options, and figure out what will be the next best step for me. But be certain that I will keep you all posted.  

Ready for what's next!

  So it's official now. No going back! Barring some unforeseen events, and a near-miracle, I'm done playing basketball as a professional.

  The great thing about basketball however, is that you can play whenever you want. But it won't be the basketball that I miss. I can find that anywhere.

  Being part of a team, and the competitive spirit, is irreplaceable. So here's to joining a new team...

  I'm ready, and excited for what is next. Stay tuned!

Running Down A Dream: Cope's Journey to the NBA

Chris in Aalst, Belgium.

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  Every August, hundreds of American basketball players, both men and women alike, head overseas to start their seasons anew.

  The game may be the same, but I have found that the motivations are different.

NBA vs. WNBA Dream
  From my perspective, women seek out the experience: of living abroad for a couple of years, while continuing to play the game they've grown to love. Salaries are less, and because the WNBA season does not coincide with the traditional basketball season, it is more of a choice for women to make the jump overseas to continue their playing career.

  Playing in the US hasn't always been an option for women, yet they've been heading overseas to play basketball for decades -- long before the WNBA was ever around. The WNBA was not the ultimate dream.

In Trier, Germany.

  Maybe the motivation is changing, however. And the dream of young girls today is to play in the WNBA, and never experience Europe.

  For boys, who play basketball and grow up watching the NBA, donning an NBA uniform is their dream. It's the ultimate goal. And it always has been.

  If they are not one of a handful of athletes selected every June in the NBA draft, they head overseas as well.

  They bid their closest friends and family members farewell for eight months, and chase that dream. Searching for just one opportunity that might lead to their big break back home.

  While a good living can be made abroad, the dream remains inside: to return to the US, and play in the NBA.

  There are varying levels of leagues in Europe, and throughout the rest of the world. Some you might call semi-pro, while others are on par with the talent seen in the NBA. Along with every other level in between.

  Chris Copeland has seen them all. Literally. But he never lost sight of his dream of putting on an NBA jersey.

Colorado days.

Cope's Story
  Chris was a freshman at Colorado when I was a senior. I can't really say how much I saw Chris play during that 2002-2003 season. Busy, diverging schedules as student-athletes didn't allow for too many games.

  But I saw enough, through practices and a handful of games, to know Chris was a basketball player. A gym rat. A hooper.

  He was skilled. Had great fundamentals. Was big and had a great shot. And had a feel for the game you couldn't teach. He also had a lot of work to do, but the most important thing, the foundation, was there.

  Fast forward seven years later to the 2009-2010 season. While we both played in Germany, I saw Chris play twice. I couldn't believe the strides he had made in his game since I'd last seen him play at CU.

  In basketball, being a 'tweener' isn't a good thing. You essentially have no position. While at Colorado, Chris was a tweener. He was a big three, and a small four. He had a great face-up game, but lacked the speed and quickness needed to excel as a small forward. And his post game was non-existent. So he was a face-up four.

  In the seven years that had passed since I'd last seen him play, while finishing his eligibility at CU, and though stints in the D-League, and stops in low-level Spanish and Dutch leagues, Chris developed and worked on his weaknesses. He went from being a tweener, to being versatile. And versatility is a huge asset in a basketball player.

  The player I saw in Germany resembled the kid I remembered at CU in looks, and looks alone. But his game suggested he had changed a great deal. Immediately I could tell he had diligently worked on his post game.

A threat from the wing, or in the post.

  His German team, Trier, ran their entire offense through him on the block. He demanded a double-team every time he touched the ball.

  Chris was essentially his team's play maker from the power forward position. Guard him one-on-one, he'd attack (and usually score). Double him, and he'd make the pass to an open teammate. Guard him with a big man to take away his post game, and he'd simply step outside and exploit his advantage there.

  Cope made it look easy. He was racking up the points and accolades, and turning heads in Europe.

  Chris and I, again, found ourselves in the same corner of the world in the 2011-2012 season. While I played in Dunkerque, I saw him play last season, in Belgium for Aalst (which I blogged about last year). And again, I saw huge growth in his game, and more-strikingly, his confidence and approach off the court.

  On the court, Chris continued to dominate and score points in bunches. Off the court, Chris threw himself into the NBA world. Constantly studying games and players. He had a one-track mind: the NBA or bust.

  His dream was alive and well. And seemingly closer and closer to becoming reality.

  After seeing him in Belgium, I knew if he got an opportunity, he'd make it happen. Which is exactly what happened.

Summer league in Vegas.

The Opportunity
  The summer of 2012, Chris finally got the chance every professional player waits for: he signed a non-guaranteed contract with the New York Knicks.

  He headed to summer league in Las Vegas, where he quickly began making his mark. And then to training camp in October, where he'd compete to make the Knicks final 15-man roster.

  At any point, Chris could have been cut.

  But just as he'd worked his way up from lower level pro leagues, to more prominent leagues each and every season in Europe, he stayed the course. On November 2, 2102 against the Miami Heat, five full seasons after finishing his eligibility at Colorado, Chris was a rookie in the NBA.
 
Our Convo -- Catching Up With Chris
  In a 25-minute phone conversation in early-April, I caught up with my fellow University of Colorado Buffalo. To hear his thoughts about his journey to the NBA. To see what the trip has been like, in his own words.

Chris and I a couple years back in Germany.

  I frantically typed as I tried my best to play the part of reporter while interviewing a friend. An odd, but fun conversation.

  There have been a few stories recently on Chris, so I wanted to focus on something I'm familiar with: comparisons between Europe and the game in the States -- the NBA. 

What did you focus on improving the most, from the time you finished at CU, until last summer?
Most recently, my focus has been on the defensive end. But since graduating, I've been try to improve all areas of my game. Ball handling, become a better athlete, my quickness. Before I thought I knew it all, but really became a student of the game. 

Was there a time where you lost sight of the NBA, and thought you couldn't make it?
Every day. When you're overseas you have your up days and your down days. You have games where you go 0-fer and you question yourself. You say to yourself: so-and-so was overseas, and he would never have gone 0-fer. A little doubt creeps in along the way.

But I always was confident, and knew I could make it. I am blessed to have a great circle of people around me.

When did it really hit your radar -- that the NBA was possible, it was right there in front of you, and you just had to grab it?
Summer league. I finally got the opportunity then, it was like, 'It's up to you. and you just gotta get the job done...'

Biggest difference between the European leagues you've played in, and the NBA...styles, level of play?

Had to double in the post.

Athleticism. Everyone is bigger, faster, stronger, quicker.

How has your approach to practice changed? To games? 
I'm working as hard as I have ever worked. I'm in the weight room, I'm shooting a ton of extra shots, getting extra workouts in.

In Europe, if you wanted to get extra work in, it was just you on your own, or maybe one of your teammates wanted in too. Now, if I want to shoot, I can grab two coaches and shoot as much as I want. So I've probably put in as much work on my own now more than ever.

What has changed for you from your most recent season in Europe, to this season? Role on team? Mentality? Individual goals? How have you adjusted from going from THE man on a team, to one of the last guys to make the roster?
It was a big time adjustment. But I knew what was expected. I was expected to be the 15th man. I just wanted to be in the NBA though, and put on a jersey. I was willing to sacrifice everything just to get there.
 

Knick huddle.

How has that changed over the course of the season as you've proven yourself?
You reach one goal, and then you set new ones. I've always had extremely lofty goals. I have new goals now...not going into too much detail, but it'll revolve around me doing a lot more work on the court. 

How stressful was training camp? Does it compare to anything you had experienced before?
The most stressful training camp I ever went through. You always feared you could be cut any day.  I had no contract. I understood that if you're not on your game, you could get sent home. 

What about your experience overseas helped you this season?
You develop that sink or swim mentality. You find out quickly in Europe, if you don't play well, they'll get rid of you. I'd been through that before, so that carried me through the whole training camp process.

Being in Europe also helped me realize the attention to detail that's needed. I had coaches who had us going through two-a-days all year round out there. But then my most recent coach was more relaxed. I found I needed something in the middle. So I learned how to train. Every player is different, and needs something different. But I learned what I need to be successful, training wise. 

Again, in Germany.

What kind of adjustments have you had to make going from being in small European towns to playing in New York?
It's dope, it's nerve wracking, it's fun. But America's my home, and this was my dream ever since I picked up a basketball as a little boy.

At the same time, it's difficult because you know everyone is watching. But my faith in God has helped me get through. 

Compared to your days in Europe, day to day, what is different for you?
The stores are open later. Restaurants are open all the time. That was the always the weirdest thing for me to adjust to in Europe. Siestas, banks closing midday, etc. Everything is more accessible, more available in the US. 

Is there anything that has surprised you along the way?
How cool my teammates are. Coming in, you heard stories. So you may have thought they would be the most difficult to deal with. But they're looking out for me. Some guys with bad reps have been the coolest to me. 

First, and most-recent, 'wow' moment?
The stars (celebrities) who have come up to me and have said 'I'm a fan yours'. And then I just say to them nooooo, I'm a fan of yours. That's been pretty wild.

Post-game duties in Aalst.

Do you and your teammates talk about Europe?
Not really. With guys who have been overseas before, like Melo and Amare, we talk about places to visit. We don't talk about the basketball really. 

But with guys who've also played in Europe, Pablo (Prigioni) and James (White), we exchange some battle stories every once in a while.

Knowing you, I already know the answer to this, but would you change anything about the path you've taken thus far?
No, it was tough. But I've made so many great relationships in my time overseas, it makes it that much sweeter. 

What's the one word of advice for someone who's trying to do what you've done?
It's difficult. Be focused. Be prepared for some dark days, you'll go through a lot of trials. But it can happen if you stay focused, and keep your eye on the goal.

  This is a guy who is the epitome of a gym rat, a basketball junkie. But not every gym rat makes it. There are dozens of guys who, just like Chris, if they get the opportunity, will turn heads. But they might not ever get that chance.

  For Chris is was, and continues to be, work ethic and focus plus the opportunity, and finally, making the most of that opportunity.

Putting in the extra effort on the court.

  Chris refused to quit. He had all the reasons and all the opportunities to throw in the towel on the NBA, and be satisfied with stardom in Europe. But he wanted more.

  So this lifelong Trail Blazer fan no longer checks the Portland box score first thing in the morning. That honor is now reserved for Cope and the Knicks. It's been fun watching his journey from afar -- his is a very special, and inspiring story.

  If I've learned one thing about Chris, it's not to doubt him. He continues to grow and improve as a player, and the basketball world continues to take note. Just this past month he was named NBA Eastern Conference Rookie of the Month for April for his torrid end to the regular season.

  Just a taste of things to come? If you listen to Chris, he'll be on the court, putting in the work. I, for one, am excited to see what he's got in store for us next.

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An Unexpected Boost

The Joys of Travel

They were nice enough to organize a surprise!

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  Jumping on a plane to travel is always exciting. Hopping on a plane to head home after months away is an even better feeling. There was one big catch, however: I had to travel 27 hours (door to door), and through four different countries to reach my destination. They didn't  say it would be easy. 

  After a surprise goodbye dinner at V & Bruno's Tuesday night (they pulled a fast one on me!), I didn't get to bed til close to 2am. With my alarm set for 5, it was going to be a quick night's sleep. 

The First Leg: Brussels

  The drive to the Brussels airport from Dunkerque is always an unknown. Without traffic you can make the drive in an hour and a half. But weekday mornings are a crap shoot. Sometimes the traffic is smooth and easy. But more often than not, it's a nightmare getting through the Belgian capital. It's famous for its 'accordian-like' qualities. Stop and go once you hit the outer limits of the city, and continuing onto the Ring that circles that city you must take to reach the airport.

V & Lily.

   Wednesday morning, it took us two and a half hours. So I was behind schedule from the get-go.

  It was a sign of things to come. 

  As I checked in for my flight, I plopped my gigantic bags onto the conveyor belt to be weighed; both were over. Oops. But I guess that's what happens when you've accumulated two year's worth of stuff. 

  I was flying Aer Lingus, a first for me. But I have to give them the thumbs up -- waived one baggage fee (out of two), gave me a free coffee on board when I had no cash left (free coffee should be a no-brainer, but not for the Irish airline), and they let me move to exit row, without paying! The flight wasn't full, and they were empty, so why not?

Camped out here for hours in Dublin.

The Second Leg: Dublin 
  I had a four-hour layover in Dublin. Since I had never been to Dublin, or Ireland before, I had been contemplating using that time to get out of the airport and see something in the city.

  With a long day ahead of me, I didn't want the hassle. I didn't feel like dragging myself into the city on a cold, dreary day, so I decided to wait it out in the airport. Luckily there was free WiFi and a nice restaurant area. So I grabbed a little lunch, and the time passed fairly quickly.

  One thing that made me smile was the flight attendant saying 'cheerio!' to me as I left the plane. I didn't know they actually said that! So I have that story to relay about Dublin. 

  I always take my chances with airplane seating at the gate. I've found that the folks at the gate are more willing to work with you and the seats with extra legroom there. At the initial check in desk they always seem to be motivated by getting you to pay for any, and everything possible. Whereas at the gate, they take your situation into consideration, and if there's an available exit row or bulk head, they'll give it to you more often than not. Maybe I shouldn't be giving away all my secrets!

The spread at my au revoir dinner. Thanks V!

  I lucked out  and got an exit row, and we were off!

  For maybe the first time ever, I was asleep before my plane even took off. I remember thinking to myself, 'just make it to the meal service, then sleep.' But before I knew it, my head was bobbing around like only it can do on a plane.  

  A family with three (loud) young children seated across the aisle made sleep longer than short spurts impossible. So I was groggy and in and out for several hours. After awaking from a slumber, I'm always afraid to look at my watch because I don't want to be bummed out when a measly two hours (out of the eight) have passed. 

  The groggy feeling I always have on trans-Atlantic flights is one of being absolutely unproductive. Once the drowsiness sets in, it doesn't matter what movies I have to watch, books to read, blogs to write, I never feel like doing anything outside of resting my tired eyes.

  Of course, the flight to Chicago was long. But it was relatively uneventful. Then the real fun began.

The Sprint Leg: Chicago

  I was one of the first people off the plane. So I made a mad dash through the long corridors to get to customs as fast as I could. I rounded the corner to get in line, only to see hundreds of people already waiting in line. It was going to be a long wait.

The rest of the crew.

  The connection to my last flight home to Portland was in two hours. 45 minutes later, I was still standing in the customs line.

  I those 45 minutes, I still needed to get through customs, grab my two enormous bags, turn in my immigration card, re-check my bags, get a boarding pass for my flight to Portland (they couldn't give me one for my last connection in either Brussels or Dublin), go through security (for the third time that day), and finally get to the gate and board.

  I've never missed a connecting flight. Ever. (Knocking on wood for future travels) But it was going to be a close one!

  Usually, my layovers in Chicago, or wherever in the US, are fairly easy-going. I have time to grab some food, fill up my water bottle, get cleaned up a little bit, and maybe wander the concourse to loosen up my travel-weary legs. Not this time around. 

  By the time I made it through customs and dropped my bags, I had 30 minutes to get my boarding pass, get through security, and get to the gate and on the plane. I was cutting it a little too close for my liking. 

My fancy wine & cheese spread.

  After encountering blase United employee after blase United employee, I was starting to get a little annoyed. They were clearly undermanned (but still in no rush it seemed) because there were many people in the same boat as I was. And lines to get boarding passes and other information weren't moving very quickly. 

  Of course no one moves with the sense of urgency you're expecting them to when you're afraid of missing your flight.

  I got my boarding pass, got through security as quickly as I could, and headed out to find my gate. I know the Chicago airport fairly well, and as I glanced at my watch, I realized I was going to start running. The long underpass from Concourse B to C was my sprint zone. 20 pounds of backpack strapped to my back, made it a little awkward, so hopefully no one was judging my form.

  By the time I got to the end of the corridor and the base of the stairs/escalators, I was breathing hard. One last run up the stairs and I'd almost be there. The sprint up the stairs put me into a full on sweat. Exactly how I wanted to be for my four-hour flight to home. Didn't know I'd also be getting a workout in that day!

Always nice to come home to this. And yes, the sun's been out!

  On top of already needing to wash my face and brush my teeth, now I desperately needed a shower. I arrived at the last gate in the concourse, my gate, with 10 minutes to spare. 

  I gave my exit row strategy another go, to no avail this time around. Minus points for you, United!

The Final Leg: Portland

  I found my seat (in the last row of the plane), and settled in. My ankles were swollen, my contacts were suction-cupped to my eyeballs, I was sweaty, hungry, thirsty, and exhausted. I couldn't help but smile anyway. And I still had five more hours to go to Portland! 

  But I was on my way home.

My Last Week Checklist

The beginning of my second season on the beach.

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  After two seasons in Dunkerque, my final week on the Northern French coast is upon me. What has been an easy-going, quiet, enjoyable, yet sometimes difficult, two seasons, is coming to a close.

  No matter how the prior eight months has gone, the last week always ends the same way: jam-packed, and far too quickly.

  There's always one more thing you wish you could do, one person you weren't able to say goodbye to, or a few things you couldn't manage to jam into your luggage.

With Lily last season.

  Two consecutive seasons always makes it a little more difficult. Especially here. I had previous relationships with people in Dunkerque, so saying goodbyes will be a little tougher. You just never know when you'll cross paths again.

  And, has been the case with every other club I've played with over the course of my career in Europe, the people you encounter, and the relationships you gain are invaluable. So it's necessary to say proper goodbyes, and express thanks for the opportunity you were afforded.

  Outside of goodbyes and thank yous, here's my checklist for the week:

Thanksgiving with V & Bruno last season.

• My plane ticket home has been booked, so that hasn't been a worry for quite some time. 
• Clean my apartment. I try to leave my apartment the way I found it. So I generally like to leave a clean apartment behind, as a sign of courtesy and respect for the club.
• Clear out fridge and pantry. This is always somewhat of a fine science. You never want to leave too much food behind. It's a waste! But on the other hand, you don't want to have too little to eat in your last few days either! You have to carefully calculate how much food (and coffee) you'll need for your remaining meals. All remaining food that will not spoil, along with spices and such, will go to friends. This also includes rationing out the final few drops of my contact solution! I don't want to have to buy anew bottle -- that will cost me dearly in the weight department! -- every ounce adds up!)

With the Coulont twins.

• Pack. All of my things have to fit into two bags. And preferably at 50 pounds or less each. Baggage fees are a pet peeve of mine, and I avoid them at all costs. So after two seasons this might be especially tough, since I've accumulated more things over the course of my stay in Dunkerque. Whatever doesn't fit, or is too heavy and I don't want, I will leave to friends here.
• Wire money home, and close out bank account. You obviously want all money issues resolved before you leave. Whether it'd be with your team regarding your contract, or with the bank.  Once you leave, it's difficult to conduct

  

  Thanksgiving at my place this year.

  business with a foreign bank abroad. And upon departure, you're basically forfeiting any money you're owed, if any, by leaving. Again, you have to do a little estimating. How much cash will you need in your remaining days? Once your bank account is closed, you no longer have access to the ATMs, and you don't want bring home too many euros in cash.
• Goodbye dinners, lunches, and BBQs. This week I've already had two five-hour lunches. The first with friends, and the second with my team. It's always nice to have one final gathering together to say goodbye, and wish each other well. I have one more the night before I leave with V, Bruno and Lily.
• Take in one last beachfront view. I don't know when, if ever, I'll be fortunate enough to live in a beach front apartment. It's been a special place to live for two seasons, and I hope I haven't taken one sunset or look out the window for granted.
• Reactivate my American cell phone.
• Get to the airport on time.
• Sit and wait. You've done all there is to do, you'll be home soon enough.

Three Buffs. With Caroline and V.

  It's just been in the last few years that I've begun to realize how ridiculous this whole 'process' is: packing your life into two bags, and moving back and forth across the world. It's the part I dislike the most; the transition. But it's also a necessary evil.

  This experience with professional basketball continues to be a unique one for me. I'm glad to be able to have both 'lives'; my life at home in the US, and my life overseas as a pro. So, with yet another season in the books, it's about time to head home!

Too many beautiful sunsets to count.

  Of course I'm anxious to get home and see family and friends, but you also know you'll be leaving valuable relationships behind. So while I'm looking ahead, I can't help but think about what's being left. You just hope you'll meet again!

  À bientôt --

A few more memorable moments from the last two seasons, but not all...

V & Lily -- last season -- Springtime Brunch.

Dunkerque Beer & Wine Festival with Bruno.

Two seasons with Aurelie.

Team visiting a local school.

Sunrise from my window.

The 2012-2013 squad.

Road trip to Nice!

Team awaiting the bus to head to the game.

Teammates Aurelie & Judit.

Lily!

My French 'family' -- Bruno, Lily, & V.

Life wasn't always a beach. Sometimes there was snow.

Practice with some youngsters.

Late evening on the beach.

Decision Day: Listening to Your Head, or Your Heart?

Using my extra free time to enjoy the beach.

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  The first of April was supposed to be decision day for the rest of my season. And the first of the month came and went pretty quickly.

  Quick recap: I've been out of action since early-March, nursing my always-delicate back.

  Officially, I was on 'work stoppage' -- which is beneficial for my club because they get an insurance return on my salary. But my work stoppage expired April 1st, and a decision had to be made: prolong the stoppage for the rest of the season, or give it another shot on the court.

  As you recall, I've only played in two games since Christmas, and was in and out of practice so much in February, it made my head spin.

Views from the sideline.

  While out, I was still able to workout and live my life normally, I just didn't play basketball. Ironic for a basketball player. I couldn't do the one thing that provides me a paycheck, and the one thing that puts me thousands of miles from home.

  It was a long three weeks on the sideline, but I knew I couldn't continue playing with how things were. It was for the best. I still had hope to finish the season on the court. So there was that to look forward to.

  After three weeks to let my back heal up (or so I hoped), I'd re-evaluate, and decide whether or not to give it a go for the last three games of the season.

My Initial Decision
  Going into the weekend (before 'decision' day), I had my mind made up. I was going to give it a go. I couldn't NOT try, right? If this was going to be my last season overseas, I wanted to finish it on the court. What's the worst that could happen?

  I had some friends from the US in town, and on our way to Brussels back from Amsterdam, we decided we'd go over the pros and cons of playing.

Reasons for Playing:
-This might be my last season as a pro. I wanted to finish on a 'good note'. And finish my career on the court, not on the sideline.
-It's my job to play. I had only done my job twice since Christmas.
-I wanted to play. I missed playing. Sitting out on the sideline is no fun.
-I wanted to help my teammates.

Reasons against Playing:
-We only had three games left in the season. And they were meaningless games. No playoffs. No relegation to worry about. With the exception of pride, whether we won or lost really had no bearing on anything.
-I didn't know how my back would react. Even after being out for three weeks, it might immediately tighten up, and I'd be back where I started. It felt basically the same as it had all winter, so I wasn't all that confident that it would be okay.
-I'd only played two games in three months, and hadn't touched a ball in three weeks. It was going to take time to get back into the swing of things (assuming my back held up). By the time I got back 'in form', the season would be over.
-I'd had problems with my back since my sophomore year in college. Problems that resulted in surgery. Since that surgery in 2001, I had been relatively healthy until this point. Why tempt things?
-I could further injure myself. Playing injured/careful often leads to more problems.

  What would you decide? 

Dunkerque.

Considering the Whole Situation
  After my friends and I went over the pros and cons, I kind of thought to myself: 'I've lost sight of what's important.'

  Thankfully I had friends around who were willing to point out the things I was overlooking.

  All I could see was that I wanted to play, and not the things that could result from that happening. They overwhelmingly thought I shouldn't play. And honestly, that surprised me. There was nothing to gain, they said. More bad can come from it than good.

  'Yeah, but I want to play,' I thought to myself. 

  I took their words into consideration, but still had yet to make up my mind when I left them at the airport in Brussels.

The Last Straw

At least there are pretty sights to look at.

  I returned to Dunkerque Sunday night, after dropping them off, and turned on the men's NCAA tournament.

  Louisville vs. Duke.

  Kevin Ware.

  That pretty much sealed the deal for me.

  He horrifically injured himself on a normal, run-of-the-mill play. It wasn't anything out of the ordinary. In fact, it's a play that occurs 10-15 times, maybe more, every game.

  And with that, my decision was made. My health was most important. And my season was over.

Handling the Cards We've Been Dealt
  I'm finishing my contract, and remaining with the team through our final game. I at least want to finish that.

Future DMBC ballers: Went to a youth game too!

  It's been an odd last half of the season. And slightly difficult for me to adjust to not playing.

  As I've written before, the sole purpose I'm in Europe is to play basketball. That's my job. My passion. And a big part of my identity. For that to be removed from the equation threw me off balance for a while. But I've recovered, and mentally I'm okay with the hand I've been dealt.

  Things never quite go as we expect them to. But like anything, life is how we react to the things that happen to us.  Dwell on it, or readjust and move on.

  I've used these weeks away from basketball to get my back as healthy as I can, and to re-evaluate my situation, and my career. Maybe it's been good to have basketball removed, it gives me a little taste of what's to come.